“Well, I am half Gallifreyan. I have two hearts and I’m not sure if I have regenerations or not, but luckily I haven’t had to find out how many I have.” Lily spoke, as she looked right into her father’s eyes.

The Doctor felt a mixture of feelings to this, she was like him, two hearts and everything. Not a Time Lord—Lady, but still it made him happy. Yet, at the same time it saddened him, he knew what the life of a Time Lord was like, and even if she didn’t have the title she still had a long life to look forward to, a life of loneliness and heartache.

He had been lucky to have companions to spare him from the solitude, for a while at least. However, Lily was young, she could only be at least twenty, and she had several years to cope with the fact that she was going to have a very long life.

This made the Doctor have another one of his ‘father feelings’. It amazed him that he had only met Lily not twenty minutes ago and in spite of that, he was giving himself the impression that he was a dad.

But, he wasn’t, not yet anyway.

Lily may be his daughter, but it was a distant future for him still. He and Martha never made love, hell they never even expressed their feelings to each other; let alone take things into the bedroom. He had feelings for her, and he knew that she had feelings for him; well he hoped she still did.

Their relationship had moved at a snail’s pace, but with the new information that was brought into light, meant that he and Martha might actually have a chance after all.

The Doctor thought he might as well throw some of his less universe-destroying questions on the table. This is after all was why his other self sent Lily to him.

“When were you born?” The Doctor asked, wondering when this miracle would show up in his life.

Lily looked up and down the paper, nodded, then looked back up, “December 24th 2008, a Christmas Eve baby, that’s me.” She replied with a smile.

The Doctor thought, and calculated in his head, ‘If it is already January,’ the Doctor began speaking in his mind, ‘Then Lily would have to be conceived in March. That’s too soon, that’s only three months. Could he and Martha establish a solid relationship and decide to have a baby in three months?’

“Are you sure?” The Doctor asked, although he was still mainly roaming around the chalkboard in his head, running months and dates in a dizzy circle.

Lily laughed, “Of course. Don’t you think I’d know when I was born?”

Jack laughed too, “Yes, that’s the Doctor,” he looked over at said person then added, “Always questioning things.”

He gave the Time Lord a slight nudge that brought the Doctor back to the present. The Doctor looked at the captain and gave him a pointed look.

Jack motioned to Lily and silently asked him, “What’s the problem?”

But the Doctor brushed the question aside with a wave of his hand and went back to the conversation.

“Sorry.” The Doctor apologized. “My mind went running, and you know when it starts going the best thing to do is to try and catch up.”

Lily only shook her head, “Don’t worry, you’re still the same man, I’m used to the randomness by now.” She chuckled softly to herself.

“Where is the other Doctor, may I ask?” Jack inquired.

Lily shook her head again, “Can’t tell you, all you need to know is that he is not here.” And there was no more said on the matter.

“Then Martha? Is she still traveling with me? Or has she decided to move on with her life? You know, career wise.” The Doctor asked as he leaned back into the cushions, adjusting himself to find a better position.

Lily looked down at the paper once more, she knew that they would ask. How could they not? But, she didn’t think so soon. Lily could feel the emotion already, she had to prepare herself. She had no idea how they were going to take this kind of startling information.

Lily glanced back up and took a deep breath, and took the enormous plunge, “My mom’s dead.”

The room grew quiet, even the bustle of the city outside seemed to become still.

The Doctor sat up, his back rigid. His eyes gaping at Lily before turning to look at Jack. The ex-time agent looked the same as the Doctor, but Jack’s face was torn between believing and doubt.

The Doctor looked back at his daughter, her face was tuck close to her chest, and a few tears could be seen gliding down her creamy cheeks. In that moment the Doctor knew that what he had just been told was true.

Somehow, in someway, Martha Jones was gone.

The Doctor looked down; his mind flooded with memories, he could see himself telling her to have a nice time visiting her family. That was two days ago, yet, now it seemed like  a lifetime ago. He suddenly longed for her to be in his arms, to reassure himself that she was alive and well.

“How?”

The question was small, but within the single word held the lifeline of Martha.

Lily looked up at Jack who asked.

“I can’t say. I’m not allowed.” Her voice was small and trembling.

“Then when?” Jack tried again.

Lily shivered slightly at the manner of his voice, like that of a broken man.

And maybe Jack Harkness was, he just found out that one of his closest friend had cease to live, it was not something he was going to brush off, even if the Doctor seemed to want to.

“WHEN, DAMMIT?!”

The four other occupants jumped at the brashness of the captain.

Lily swallowed her tears, she glanced between Jack and her future father, “December 24th …2008.” Her answer barely a whisper, but everyone heard it.

“She dies in childbirth.” The Doctor answered Jack’s question on how Martha had died.

Lily nodded.

The Doctor recalculated his previous equation in his head, a year. Martha Jones had only one year left of life. That was too soon. He was not ready to lose her that soon.

“So what happens, complications during the birth?” The Doctor was grasping at straws, trying to have any information he might prevent this unthinkable incident.

Lily seemed like a nice girl, but if she was the reason for Martha’s death, then maybe he would have to give Lily up. He could stop this; if he and Martha never make love to create Lily then Martha would not have to die. The logic was there.

Lily nodded, “Yes, there were complications, but you didn’t do anything to stop them.”

The Doctor was once again disrupted abruptly from his thinking. “What do you mean I don’t do anything, you’re saying I just let your mother die?”

Lily nodded again, “Yes, that is what I’m saying.”

The Doctor shook his head furiously, “I don’t believe you. I don’t believe for one moment that I just sit by and watch her die and not do anything about it.”

Lily butted in, “You didn’t have a choice, you have to just sit by, and if you didn’t’ then the world would be in danger.”

“Why, tell me why? If I just let Martha die then the world would be safe? What the hell do you take me for?” The Doctor’s voice rose as he did off the furniture, his eyes full of rage, but his body language was calm; which in Lily’s opinion was even more terrifying.

She had never seen her father like this, nor did he warn her about his younger self’s reactions. Lily was frightened, here was the Oncoming Storm with all its fury and she was standing in his path.

Lily had considered herself a very courageous person, but now she seemed so very small sitting in her chair. Cowering from the man she will someday call ‘father’.

Jack brought a hand up and touched the Doctor’s arm lightly, the Doctor’s eyes softened a little as he glimpsed down and sighed softly. He managed to contain his emotions once more. He ran his hands up his face and continued through his hair. He sat back down, and was once again silent.

Lily went back and forth between the two men. She looked back to Stephen and Charles, but they had slipped out of the room, she didn’t know weather is was out of respect or fear.

All in all, Lily was alone.

“I’m sorry; I don’t know what it’s like. I had to grow up without her, I never knew her, I can’t grieve for her. I wish that you hadn’t sent me to tell you this, but you did. Or you will.” Lily had once again composed herself. Her sheet of paper had dropped unnoticed to the floor. It couldn’t help anymore.

“But, what I say is true. It’s not like you want her to die, but you have no choice.” Lily added softly.

The Doctor and Jack looked again at her, their sadness could be seen in their eyes, but it didn’t go as far as actual tears.

“Why?” The Doctor began. “Why does she have to…” He couldn’t finish the sentence, but Lily understood anyway.

“I have to be born, you see I am the only one to save the world.” Lily took another deep breath, and exhaled in quickly. “I won’t give you all the details, it’s too complex, but two years ago we found ourselves in one serious battle. And I saved the day. I was the only one to defeat the “enemies” and I manage to keep this world and the universe from blowing up. Literally.”

The Doctor and Jack looked confused.

“If Martha never dies, then I do. It can only be one of us that lives, I don’t write the rules, but that’s how it has to be. ” Lily tried to explain. “And if I’m the one who dies, then so does the world, the universe and everything in it.”

“I can change it, I can make it so neither of you has to…” The Doctor tried to say, but was cut off by his daughter.

“No you can’t.”

“You don’t know that, I’m brilliant; which you already know, I can fix everything.”

“But you don’t, I’m still here, talking with you. Mom’s not here, which means you don’t change a thing. You still make the same choice, because you know, as well as I do that it is the right thing.” Lily said.

“The right thing? How can you say that, she’s your mother?” Jack asked.

“Yes she was, and she gave her life for me. And the only way I can pay her back is to live with no regrets.” Lily looked at her father, “You are the Doctor, when the moment comes for you to make the decision you will make it just like you already have. No different then he did. That is what he told me to tell you. To make sure you are ready to make that choice. You have three months, and I know, as sure as I am still sitting here, you have already made that choice.”

The Doctor was silent for a moment, then asked, “How can I sacrifice her life for the world?”

Lily could only smile sadly, “That’s what you have to figure out."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That was his dilemma now, as the memory came to a close he hugged Martha closer to him. He only had three more days to make sure that Lily was going to be created.

Three days to make sure that the universe’s future was safe.

Lily was right, he was the Doctor, and he had made the decision that afternoon as he and Jack made their way back to the TARDIS.

It was simple, one life for the lives of billions. The logic was there.

But, as the Doctor stared into the darkness of the hotel room, he wished that he was just one of the billions of ordinary beings and not the Time Lord. A single tear escaped from the corner of his eye, he looked down at the sleeping figure once again.

He kissed her forehead gently.

Martha shifted slightly in her sleep and settle back in his arms.

Yes, to be just an ordinary being, who did not have to give up his love just when he was beginning to love all over again.